Can You Bear It?

The photographer for a national magazine was assigned to get photos of a major fire. Smoke at the scene was too thick to get any good shots, so he frantically called his home office to hire a plane.

“It will be waiting for you at the airport!” he was assured by his editor.

Sure enough, when he arrived at the small rural airport, a plane was warming up near the runway. He jumped in with his equipment and yelled, “Let’s go! Let’s go!” The pilot swung the plane into the wind and soon they were in the air.

“Fly over the north side of the fire,” said the photographer, “and make three or four low level passes.”

“Why?” asked the pilot. “Because I’m going to take pictures! I’m a photographer, and photographers take pictures!” said the photographer withgreat exasperation and impatience.

After a long pause the pilot said, “You mean you’re not the flight instructor?”

Mother Balloon and Father Balloon were in bed, and their child balloon came in and said that he could not sleep. So  his parents said: Climb  in with us.

After a lot of squeaking and slithering Junior found he did no have enough room, so he let out a little air of himself, but found there was still not enough room. So he secretly let some air out of his mother and then his father.

When he woke  in the morning he found his father standing over him wagging his finger and saying “ You not only let your mother down and your father , but most seriously of all, you let yourself down.”

And a dreadful pun makes three...

An Indian chief was feeling very sick, so he summoned the medicine man. After a brief examination, the medicine man took out a long, thin strip of elk rawhide and gave it to the chief, telling him to bite off, chew, and swallow one inch of the leather every day. After a month, the medicine man returned to see how the chief was feeling. The chief shrugged and said, “The thong is ended, but the malady lingers on.”